Ashkenazic Jewish Foods, Ranked Without Explanation

Good

1. Chicken soup

2. Kasha varnitchkas

3. Good cholent

4. Borsht

5. Potato kugel

6. Fruit compote

7. Blintzes

8. Kasha pierogen

9. Potato knish

10. Kasha knish

11. Pickles

12. Shmaltz herring

13. Homemade gefilte fish

14. Brisket

15. Fresh horseradish

16. Challah

17. Charoset

18. Latkes

19. Hamentashen

20. Babka

21. Bialy

22. Kreplach

23. Mandelbrot

24. Kasha

OK I Guess

25. Matzah balls

26. Bagels

27. Rugelach

28. Cheese cake

29. Dairy kugel

30. Lox

31. Smoked whitefish

32. Frozen loaf gefilte fish

33. Sugary “Kosher Palette” salads

34. Noodle kugel

[sc name="ad-300x600"]

35. Lekach

36. Sufganiyot

37. Matzah brei

38. Vegetable kugel

39. Kraintz cake

40. Sweet and sour cabbage soup

41. Stuffed cabbage

42. Teiglach

43. Schav

No Way Ever

44. Shmura matzah

45. Cholent made with hot dogs, ketchup, or bbq sauce

46. Potato salad, coleslaw, egg salad made with mayonnaise

47. Vegetable compote

48. Spinach knish

49. Sweetened horseradish

50. Pastrami

51. Tzimmes

52. The Rosh Hashanah fish head

53. Challah kugel

54. Coconut macaroons

55. Kichel

56. Soup Mandelach

57. Farfel

58. Kishke – vegetarian

59. Gribnetz

60. Deli roll

61. Kishke – real

62. Jarred gefilte fish

63. Chopped liver

64. Being forced to watch “Schindler’s List” again

65. Ptchaw

You probably hate me now. Tell me why I am wrong in the comments. (BTW, I am right. HAHAHA!)

Image: Daniel/Flickr. And this article was inspired by Albert Berneko of Deadspin.com, whose food rankings are some of the funniest content on the Internet.